What I want for Christmas…

…is all I’ve ever hear children saying

I mean I thought this was a season for giving

Not expecting, receiving, or requesting…

Then I wonder if it is season for sharing and caring

Why does it only last but a season; is my inclination

Instead sublime euphoric euphemisms a façade passed in conversation while standing in line to get that gift; for the type of “present”

they want; “future” generations never the true meaning to be taught

To give; those in plain sight; those whom have a plight

not only the ones we adore deserves the gift;

as you sift through stores, online, in lines we fight

never once teaching our children what’s right; giving is divine

especially giving of yourself; without expectation

of  waiting for reciprocation of something in kind.

This is what I had in mind; instead of cutting short the phrase

“What do you want for Christmas?” finish this statement

With “…to give?” and start new trends; old one erase.

Then maybe spirituality may begin to ferment.

I know, I know, the arguments will rage on

About politics, human nature, and so on and so on

But what do we got to loose if you choose to make the change

Even if this piece is a lil idealistic, my faith still remains the same

Instead of asking our children what they want for Christmas

Ask them what to give for Christmas; to become selfless

“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”

- Winston Churchill

Sweatin Tears

Sweatin Tears

At a joggers pace we try to keep stride

Watchin our breathin checkin our pulse

we got eachother coming in our sleep; shits deep we can’t hide

Checkin our time our bodies blowin our mind; phuk

Pride aside; at eachothers side we stay in stride

this intimate marathon as we stay the course

frantically as I try to navigate and steer

but who I’m foolin; my rudder she controls

wiping my brow; she’s got me sweatin tears

Pusle starting to race no longer steady

heart throbbing pulsating almost heady

with wave after wave coming on my deck

rocking this boat not wise but what the heck

we pitch and dip; capsizing not a concern

in her swell submerged is my stern

with her bow raised like the titantic

just before we sink a feeling of panic

over takes us loves under tow; exhaustion is near

as we got eachother sweatin tears.

The End is Near

The End is Near

This is my greatest fear

To witness the tragedies inherent in life

makes one not willing to really care

about battling evil and eliminating strife

the incessant tribulations of futile attempts

at being, courageous, righteous and pure

to those that don’t care I implore

for it you that hold life contempt

cause your life you spent

seeding anger, envy, vengeful demeanor

a barren land is your heart

where nothing grows but sorrow

draws you farther apart

from the love that holds life together

for what you lost you still can regain; however

you must change within to keep from going without

that of your hearts desire even in the face of fear

until this happens I truly believe for us; the end is near.

Live and Learn

You Live and You Learn

You live and you learn; my grandfather once said

A day gone without learning; is a day you haven’t lived

then if you’re not livin you must be dead

dead is the spirit lifeless with nothing to give

So along the way I’ve learned much

Life’s a challenge a journey by touch

Feeling my way through innuendos’ emotions

Nothing more than notions consisting of potions

Seducing me back to sleep; letting life to pass

Hoping I’ll miss a calling, causing a life impasse

But I am life’s insomniac; can’t sleep on it

with distraction’s wit and it’s misleading tricks

to lull my soul into a spiritual black hole; bottomless pit

for I have learned nothing and might as well quit

That’s easy for some but not for me

I’ve heeded the warnings, made the choice; a voice I listen to

From my soul speaking to me loquaciously

Teaching me lessons learned; passing them from me to you

So this lil retort, banter, I hope forms like a cancer

In your mind, heart, or soul maybe…

To let life live you is never the answer

But for you to live it fully

Don’t sleep through life mediocre state; nothing to give

Remember you live and you learn

A day gone without learning is a day you haven’t lived

I Dream

I Dream

I dream the dreams in a waking state

Trying to distinguish between what’s real and what’s fake

I feel the sun reaching inside me burning my soul

Consuming my body mind and all

This burning sensation I can’t describe

Although not painful; I still cry inside

From the burning desires of what I want to be

That which I am; but not totally

Life inconsistencies stigmatic flux of events

Stifles my progress; foiling all my attempts

Like that dang monkey and his wrench

Him and Murphy’s Law leave me bent

Twisted forever adjusting just to fit

In this thing called life, like a contortionist

Awaking to this state, I try to escape

The reality created for me from perception

Intangible things; its true nature innate

Are the thoughts of their misconceptions

Or recollections of past transgressions

Not by me but by other so called friends

Hence why I dream the dreams in a waking state

trying to distinguish between what’s real and what’s fake

I Gotta Pee

I Gotta Pee

I just woke up; in the middle of the night

my emotional bladder full and tight

walkin in darkness as I seek relief

Feeling like I’m going to burst is my belief

Down the hallway of emotions feeling my way;

Stubbing my toe on the end-table along the way

Of this relationship, oh such pain unimaginable

As I limp and hop through conversations

Your tactics like jacks I step on; causes exploding sensation

Overwhelms me wanting to curse

And piss all over the place; but that would just make it worst

So I hold it in knowing the muscle to be exercised

Getting weak soon the leak words of despise

Out of pain thinking relief will be gained

But a mess will be left if; so my piss I restrain

Until I can properly relieve myself

At the right time/place, relief will be felt

Keeping this in mind,  I step lightly;

through the darkness a light shines brightly

The door cracked open ever so slightly

Letting me know relief is near

Where I can release what I’ve held all these years

My emotional bladder, strained by mental vandalism

No longer being held in; no fear of criticism

Now relieved of this piss I can think clearly

…imagine all this just because I had to pee.

What I think when God Looks at Me

What I think God sees lookin at Me

it's immeasurable by my standards; this is beyond me

literally, "...it's beyond me;" and my scope of vision

forbids me on his level to my level of comprehension

so it's hard to begin to think honestly

what I think God sees when he looks at me

So since I won't tempt God; nor shall I fate

by being audacious enough; into myself seducing

into a mental state; or even try to relate

my imperfect state of mind to perfect state of being

by trying form an answer; I would eternally hesitate

Only because what I think God sees when he looks at me

is literally beyond me....

Autn:ID - 30299

Isaiah 55:8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.

I Wonder

I Wonder

I sit and ponder about things and wonder

When the sun rises, does it rise for me

To show me the beauty of my life; I wonder

Night stars a guiding light in darkness for I to see

This map of the universe; oh the days I curse

Lost in it’s eternity; because this map I can’t read

Missing the signs leading me back to the source

A life with you; how I should proceed

With the bumps in life’s road; causing me to fail

to be like the blind; who read life not with eyes

but with what they feel; like reading brail

only then can I prevail with everything I try

Trusting what I touch; believing what I feel

For; if common sense was just that

Common; then all life luster lost, with no appeal

This life to offer, nothing dynamic only static

I sit and ponder about things and wonder

When the sun rises, does it rise for me

To show me the beauty of my life; I wonder

Night stars a guiding light in darkness for me to see..

Coo - Coo

Coo-Coo

Tic Toc

Echoing in my head; sitting here bored

Rather be partying instead bored outta my gorg

Tic Toc

Like molasses in the dead of winter; the hour hand creeps

I lay here like an insomniac wishing I could sleep

Tic Toc

Setting the pace this stupid clock; a very slow pace at that

I can’t help but think what my friends are doing; where’re they at

Tic Toc

Pacing the floor now wearing the rug thin

Feels like I’m losing my mind; with nothing to do

No need for the clock to chime

on the hour I’ll be the one going coo-coo

Tic Toc

Maybe if I close my eyes and stop watching time

It’ll pass me by unnoticed; then it’ll be tomorrow before I know it

But then what will I do; the same as today

Sit and watch for time again; slowly passing my way

Greeting me like it always do “Tic-Toc”

As it makes me “Coo-Coo”

You say I’m bored…I believe so too. Tic-Toc; Coo-Coo

Diary of a Step-Father

Diary of a Step-Father

Step up to be a father; or a father to be stepped on

Trying to figure it out;

You a man I’m a man

That’s your child I understand;

Yet here you stand; getting your life on track

Of the crack; that’s the plan

So

Why for you; I have so much hate and contempt

A this life you createdThen discarded

Now with me, her Step-Father, time is spent

Yet still I’m dumbfounded by your attempts

Now you want to be involved in a life you gave up

For crack cocaine it’s a damn shame

Now in my face shaking my hand saying “wassup man”

This dance I entertain; although you knows my distain

As we smile cheaply; oh how it’s he I despise

Although cordial and friendly to the naked eyes

Of those around us; it seems so

Like we’re friends; these two men

Now I have to commend you

On your ways; trying to mend; but I can’t pretend

Or try to hide the frustration in the end

Sitting here knowing my own child I never see

But child support still pursues me

For a child I help give birth

But never allowed to see this child I brought to this earth

Only because child support and visitation

Two separate things; in this great nation

LMAO

The bigger man I am; never to stand between

The rights of a father and my pride

But what does it do for my selfesteem

When on my back you step; the father you weren’t

Now you want to be a parent

Without earning the right

Cause drugs caused you to loose sight

Of the things I now hold dear

A fine line I must now walk

Between my daughter’s feelings

And my contempt for you and what I know

Keeping it straight in my heart and soul

With you and our talks; dealings; to show I’m in control

Even if you’re not with me; no bother

Because I’m what you couldn’t be and Stepped up to be a Father

For the life you’re trying to claim

Your child ain’t the same; changed

With knowledge from me gained

From a spiritual plain

The love of my life this Step-Father has attained.

FANCY TALK

FANCY TALK

Is what you call it; nah bruh

Just words to paper that’s all

To you incomprehensible meaning not understood

6 syllable words; I spit to ya even though from da hood

It just proves to the masses against you; that just wouldn’t quit

What I thought to be farce until I saw it for myself; about you being illiterate

Meaning showing or marked by a lack of familiarity with language and literature

You’re not dumb; not by far

Sharp as knife you are

Proven by your quick wit

With past bullshit…you just won’t quit

the opportunities you had I wasn’t afforded that’s for sure

so I matured and began to open up my own doors

However just like you; I went through the same torment and despair

The same bullshit; made me not want to care….

So my mind grew louder, not my mouth; with words of linguistic form

In monosyllable, morpheme; a collocation of idioms, and phrases with locution

filled archaism type coinage; because of my colloquialism of euphemisms

just loaned words with modernism and not just neologisms

is all I’ve every tried to share;

but you’d rather get angry and twisted than learn these words; nah you won’t dare

that’s cool though; on your level I also can get

So phuk the dumb shit; I’ve called it quits

Long before; that’s why I choose to ignore

All the past issues you at me you try to spit

rockin loud but not sayin shit

about common knowledge; you just frontin

the boy now a man; needin to be respected 4sho

otherwise motherfucker; get ta steppin out tha door

where you’ll meet in the street

in the name of God on those you verbally beat

while stomping on them with your feet

You say you’re not bitter anymore

You’re saved and cured…..

And you’ve learned that you can only control yourself

a lesson short lived that day; harsh word were dealt

And if mom wants to stay in a verbally abusive relationship, that’s her business

You’re right; encountering the same from you; verbal abusiveness

From the one who tried to protect her; you say your real; true dat

Real consistent at screamin cussin, fussin and bustin in fact

Without tack, you attack; standing in da face is where you stand no matter the cost

To be a man you demand respect; while in the land of the lost.

No disrespect is meant; keeping it simple my intent

No fancy talk, just words I spew;

So if ya got bent behind these words I sent

I wouldn’t trip; not off your form to which you stay true

if you were say to me Phuk You!

Liquid Words

Liquid Words

Leaky is a poet’s mental faucet

Drops of thoughts flow

As though pressure to great

To hold back or cut off

No washer to replace; nor filter to filtrate

A poet’s flow of liquid words

Whether collected in your heart

Absorbed in your mind

or flushed down society’s drain

Liquid will words continue to flow;

From all poets to you just the same

For you to pour it out or consume and hydrate your brain

As the seas covering two third of the planet

So is their mind covered; infinitely deep like the seas

Minuet in comparison to the universe and it’s  galaxies

Yet still exist; ever present, flowing outward

A poet’s Liquid words

By Jelaco

Love Lust

Love Lust

Morning mist wave after wave

on my face; my heart drowned

 in oceans tides under currents

 subliminal trust lost to lust; forgiveness a must

 search we try for reasons why

 they had to forsake trust for lust

 I remember times when life, a gust of love’s fresh air

nothing left but the despair of love lost

 including trust; to the lust they had to have, a must

so now I fear love the most never again allow myself

to love or lust

 now only myself I trust

all because of love lust; love lost

by Jelaco

Breakfast In Bed

...as I roll over; your scent awakens me

fresh brewed coffee; you know the flavor toffee

not wanting the usual eggs and bacon ya know

a change from the norm; switch it up and go

a bowl of grits is all I get

her grits I don't kiss; covered in butter, I eat complete

her danish on the side; glazed preferred...my, my, my

her buns I don't want none; only her cream pie

is to die for as I waffle in her syrup soaked pancakes

All the while; In my head

thinking how nice it is to have breakfast in bed....

by Jelaco

DIARIES OF THE INTERNET

DIARIES OF THE INTERNET

My soul pumps words
My spirit circulates
through my body to yours
pausing wanting to hesitate
to keep rhythm with your heart
through which my spirit circulates
supplying what's been missing
the words to the music in your heart
But still; bewilder me it does
trying to understand what was
the point to countless nights alone
it eludes me now; why are we prone
to sleep each night by ones self
this lonely hand that's dealt
to you and I; still we wonder why
night after night she's not felt
by my side night after night I wonder why...

Because fraudulent people are every where; men, women alike
however there are time like this; what we share
that gives hope to our life's plight
to find true people that don't compare
to the fake facade sometimes found on this site.
so yes it is refreshing to mind, body and soul
to meet people such as yourself here
That's why, if I may say or be so bold
to express my appreciation for you my dear....
a love song of the soul; words now to make it whole
your soul; music to my ears; eliminating my fears...

...and blessed you are....
intelligence and beauty by far
watched from distance like a star
your light travels; touches me....
I bow to my queen; serving humbly
your wish; fantasies to fulfill
I do as you please; you do as I will
as the world watches; it comes to a stand-still
watchin us indulging the wonders of what we share
others won't dare; to attempt; nah they're too scared
to touch the music feel the words; together we made/make.....
damn they just can't shake....

by Jelaco

SELFISH LOVE

...that's what we do; unconsciously without a clue
give love to be loved; instead of being "LOVE"
Power of attraction is the key; "LOVE" is all you have to be
instead we try to give love; make love; keep love in vain
hoping for reciprocation; appreciation; and never the pain
that we feel; the love we give never real
just the deal we make the unwritten rules
for others to please our souls; we love, who we choose
those worthy; or capable of returning the gift
so we search for those individuals;
like a miner searching for gold; thru life we sift
ready to stake our claim; it's a damn shame
a "pan handler" we are; hoping to be blessed
by giving love; to be "LOVE" nothing less
then disdained when feelings get hurt just the same
by the ones thought worthy; now you stop giving, what you're not
"LOVE" you withdraw; now seeing but never gave any thought
how we love people for how they make us feel; what was taught
I mean really...does that make sense at all
just how they make you feel; Com'on, really what's the deal
No wonder we're so twisted in a mental state
needing others for our emotions to reinstate
compensating what we lack within; now we depend
on those around us to cradle us; a mental playpen
with rattles, musical toys and hanging mobiles
to entertain us until they're gone removed
and then once again we feel screwed
by the world or the one we loved....

How selfish are we to love cause it feels good to "we"
never for "them" do we "love"; that's the lesson to be learned
"To be, or not to be...", 'LOVE;" that's the question, seriously

Never the road easy I agree; tis the only way to be that which we yearn...Unselfish Love
by Jelaco

N.I.G.G.A.

N.I.G.G.A.

…you say how you figure; forbidden word I spoke

before you jump to conclusions; let me finish

it was something once mentioned in a quote

Never Ignorant Getting Goals Accomplished

It’s not like the other word ya know what I mean

That was use to enslave, enrage, and provoke

Me into fighting the description and stereotypes it seems

only it instigate fights,  and people I wanna choke

So now when someone calls me a N.I.G.G.A

I don’t get uptight; or let my self-respect diminish

I simply response to the their ignorance; how you figga

I’m Never Ignorant Getting Goals Accomplished

by Jelaco

Where they were....

Where they were....

...is where I been; revisiting the past now and then
looking back on time; only for it to pass us by
watching, wondering, pondering.....why
I let such beauty; yes you and I; leave me reminiscin’
moments echoing in my heart; damn I miss them where should I start

Where they were...

...is where I begin; still wanting them now and then
looking back on time; no longer needed;
because time stands still waiting to be greeted
by love started; never finished; no more need to be reminiscent

Where they were...

...is where I wanted to be; past mistakes made regrettably
the hands of time which stole from us; now works for us remarkably
Hour hand moved by minutes of the second hand; dealt to us
a "Life Transplant" is what we call it...
I'm the donor and you're the recipient.

Where they were

...no longer a concern
where we are...to be; is up to you and me
a passion thought extinguished still burns
hotter than before; our essence; our love, eternally...
by Jelaco

Kindred Spirits

Kindred Spirits

Kindred spirit from afar; drawn closer

she to know me and for me to know her

like the sun  you shine from a distance

yet your warmth touches me in every instance

so these words I share with you; sincere and true

kindred spirits we are; from afar drawn closer..

by Jealco

 

If Only…

If Only…

....as a friend till the end

and sit with me a while; lets pass the time and then

you'll know more of me; not just the writings of my pen

or the character behind the pen within

me is the soul of a boy living amongst men

with experiences now made this boy a man; Amen!

So enjoy me as you will....as a friend till the end

explore the rest of me, my soul; my virtues my sins

to discover me all over again and again.....

then decide if I'm worth the title "Friend till thee end"

by Jelaco

 

Dirty Thoughts

Dirty Thoughts

...I wish you to share with a me, starving,

deprived of love; sexual healing needed

with doubts of a fantasy coming true; leaves me dreaming

two cool people melting in passion; dripping wet

of sweet nectars; from sectors of our bodies; your taste I won't forget

I grow with excitement; as you encourage me more

with enticing words; I can only implore

to share with me the possibility; I no longer want to endure

the torture of what's to be sought; revealed to me your Dirty Thought

by Jelaco

I'm Your Baby

I’m Your Baby

for as long as you have me

your baby boy, toy, if need be

to laugh and giggle; while it's me you tickle

till I'm blue in the face with tears that trickle

down my cheek; it's you that makes me weak

in the knees; on which I crawl, for you I seek

cause now I'm hungry, for your attention as all babies do

cramping with hungry, causes me to buckle; seeking only you

on your body I of which to suckle; your life juices, sweetest dew

comes from you; feeding me life into the man I'm to be

for you and you only; that's why I say "I'm your baby"

by Jelaco

Joy of Sharing

 Joy of Sharing

The sharing of joy, can be perpetual

whether physical, emotional, psychic, or intellectual

forms a bridge between all involved

for which can be the awakening; then we evolve

to understanding much of what is not shared between one another

and lessens the threat of our difference; never to put asunder

our true friendship that consists not in the multitudes

but in their worth and value; of this friendship constitutes.

by Jelaco

Magnificent We Are

Magnificent We Are

A complex life we are; formed with such detail

Like a watch; fine tuned; synchronous movements

Each component of our existence works to reveal

the a necessity for each other is proven

We tell the time and hold the time

For those around us within us

Milestones in life is when we chime

Highlights the precipitous; others take notice

So like the hands of time we move

Through existence setting the pace

Each movement, choice, we choose

To prove how magnificent we are; the human race.
by Jelaco

Live Your L.I.F.E.

Live Your Life

…not that of others and what they say

Never should their words get in the way

Of your thoughts, passion, and goals

that you strive for. Instead opinions take toll

of your mind body and soul

like a virus passed by a hand shake

their gossip and rumors pass by a smile so fake

infecting your soul seeding contempt

controlling your actions like a puppet

Posing as your friend with only best intentions

However what they stand to gain they fail to mention

The strings attached to your heart; they strive

To hold tight; as they continue to deprive

You of your right to Live Your Life….

by Jelaco

Between The Sheets

Between the Sheets

…is where we meet; with expectations

In mind; bodies entwined; probing sensations

Leaving the rest to our imagination

With our legs dancing in the sheets

To the pulsating tones of our heartbeats

Keeping pace; our bodies whine rhythmically

With each gesture carries the notion

keeping in motion this sensual locomotion

with steam building between the sheets

sweat pours between us

our climb to ecstasy is steep

together we reach the summit

as our juices begin to seep

all over us; while In Between the Sheets

….is where we meet; with expectations

In mind; bodies entwined; probing sensations

Leaving the rest to our imagination

by Jelaco

 

What I Feel...

What I Feel

…it seems so real; yet at times

I find it hard to deal; with impending signs

My joy they try to steal; through emotional crimes

To my heart it is revealed; then to lash out I’m so inclined

but I don’t for their fate is sealed; intervention so divine

their treachery no longer concealed; the lies they hid behind

the hand of revenge they feel; as truth’s light, on them shines

now their word have no appeal no matter how sublime

now what I feel is so real; no remorse for you, not this time…

by Jealco

R.U.M.O.R.S.

R.U.M.O.R.S.

Ridiculously is how they speak

Undeveloped in their thoughts

Minds not fully at their mental peak

Overtly they concur a slur; never were they taught

Reinforcing a statement unproven is weak

Stupidity is only proven in the end; when caught

While demonstrating

Ridiculously Undeveloped Minds Overtly Reinforcing Stupidity

Love Editions

As editor of this love edition you are leary; so it's me you query

as to the love design; which on you your heart left an imprint

with my actions as proof; with you the time spent

although jocular; the results can only be spetacular

Even as I sort through my emotions; with notions

of this lyrical type or of love potions

in hopes of the ultimate reward of your heart

given to this slush; hoping to set apart

my Love Editions from those with intent

posing as my agent; with attempts to represent My Love Editions....

by Jelaco

G.O.S.S.I.P.

G.O.S.S.I.P.

Getting Off Secretly Spreading Incorrect Propaganda

Is what we do; to what end do I wander

Why you talk about people in such a way

Never having anything good to say

Nothing positive or beneficial

Just drama and lies based on the superficial

Never really having all the facts; you just attack

With second and third party information; you run with the pack

Never stopping to consider the source

Believing what you hear or being an audience; which is worse

Without consulting with the one about whom you speak

But that takes a strong person; not someone who’s weak

To seek the truth and speak on that; nah that’s not fun

I find it very complimenting when my life fills yours

In such a way; just to talk about me you adore.

I got it; I know you like G.O.S.S.I.P

even if I don’t understand it

I ain’t mad at ya

Getting

Off

Secretly

Spreading

Incorrect

Propaganda

by Jelaco

L.I.F.E.

L.I.F.E

Love Intensely Forgive Eternally is what to do

Life is to be lived; not for it to live you

it's the quintessential thing that we have

taken for granted; until time to pay the grimm reaper his due

Then we reflect on times present and times past

So I challenge you; although you might not have a clue

to begin to live your life instead of it living you.

as we all know, life is short

linear in nature; we are all terminal creatures

what we experience here; love, hatred and fear

the road you travel although may never be clear

have faith in what you know to be true

tried and tested by you

and follow the path now made clear

then life you'll no longer fear, of things to come

and things of past

cause the power within make any issue miniscule in contrast

remember the essence of God; our life was given

never to be taken for granted that you are livin

for this too will soon expire

revealing to all our lies, truths, and desires

when it's all said and done; and the question asked of you

did you live life or did it live you.

L.I.F.E

by Jelaco